At this point in my magical career, I’ve been depending on Demons more than the mpungo. But I still work with them, particularly Lucero and Mama Chola Wengue. I’m diving more into the Goetia right now and into what I thought would be my Demonolatry past. I guess the Demonolatry never leaves once initiated into it, but it goes into the background if you find another path you think may be it. I’m going to admit that I am unsure of how my Palo future is going to be, if I’ll get initiated or not. It makes me rather sad. It was part of multiple readings that I’d be a Yaya in Palo.
I’ve always had the Demons to lean on for support. They have never refused me help or attention. But now, it’s just a different hierarchy I’m working with, and it feels MUCH better for me. I was kind of overwhelmed by the Goetia. And I hate all of that “ceremonial magick” bullshit that goes along with it. But my apprentice eased me into it. It’s funny that the teacher is learning a lot from the student. And she gave me some more Palo books, which is interesting, because she doesn’t really know much about it!
Working with the Demons brings a certain familiarity and comfort back into my life, though the way that I work with them differs a lot. I go by instinct, not the way the books will tell you to. I just make sacred space, a circle with Goetic enns, using my special tracing sigil and the correct gestures, and sit there and they come talk to me. I talk to Paimon a lot. My patron will speak to Paimon and I’ll get a message. I don’t know why Leviathan does that. Take heed, I’m not exactly a soft polytheist. I’ll leave it at that.
To those who want to laugh at me, have fun, because I’m laughing at you. Spirituality is not linear. People change throughout their lives. They don’t have to constantly do the same fucking thing.